Growing Older, Gratefully

First published at Between the Lines News on May 21, 2009 This column hits the internet on the eve of my fortieth birthday. Forgive a middle-aged columnist for indulging in some reminiscing. Little reminders of my age keep creeping up, like the fact that I had to re-word the last sentence after initially writing “This… Continue reading Growing Older, Gratefully

Hoping for a Warmer Mother’s Day

First published at on May 9, 2009 Sunday will be Mother’s Day, and I’ll be thinking about various mothers in my life. My own mother, with whom I have a great relationship. She and my father live in another state and will be coming to visit me several days later. My two grandmothers, who… Continue reading Hoping for a Warmer Mother’s Day

Gay Sex Isn’t Weird. Sex Is.

First published at on January 16, 2009 Why are our opponents so obsessed with butt sex? I’ve personally pondered this question more times than is probably healthy. It occurred to me a few weeks ago when a poster on a conservative blog complained that gays “expect us to approve of butt sex and call… Continue reading Gay Sex Isn’t Weird. Sex Is.

So Clay’s Gay

First published at Between the Lines News on October 2, 2008 Clay Aiken is gay. This is not news. Lindsay Lohan might be gay, too. (Her answer during a radio interview was noncommittal enough to leave room for “clarifications” later.) Big yawn. You know what would be news? It would be news to learn that… Continue reading So Clay’s Gay

Missed Pride

First Published at in June 2008. “Is he your brother?” It’s a simple question, but it startled me. My partner Mark and I were outside planting flowers, and Mark had gone to the garage to fetch the lawnmower. Across the street, a landscaper and his young son tended to a neighbor’s yard. It was… Continue reading Missed Pride

Defending Drag Queens

First published at on June 9, 2008 June brings pride parades, which brings out drag queens in bright sunlight. I don’t envy anyone wearing pancake makeup, a wig, heels and pantyhose in 90-degree weather. I particularly don’t envy drag queens, who—like other gender non-conformists in our society—suffer more than their share of unfair criticism.… Continue reading Defending Drag Queens

Compassion for Craig?

First published on September 4, 2007, at Jim West, Jim McGreevey, Ted Haggard, Mark Foley, Bob Allen, David Vitter. Now Larry Craig. Public figures’ getting caught with their pants down is nothing new. What is new is a high-tech culture that makes exposure likely, rapid, and widespread. Larry Craig pleaded guilty to “disorderly conduct”… Continue reading Compassion for Craig?

Small Conversions, Big Victories

First published at on July 9, 2007 If I were the religious type, I might be preparing for Armageddon right now. You see, last weekend my partner Mark and I drove out to his parents’ house to help with yard work. This in itself would be unremarkable except that, as recently as Christmas, Mark’s… Continue reading Small Conversions, Big Victories