Coming Out Later

My latest at HuffPo, on coming out of the closet a bit later in life: Perhaps the most important lesson is that people come out at all ages….It’s not as if the popularity of Glee means that, from now on, all LGBT folk will come out as teens, surrounded by a supportive, talented and ridiculously… Continue reading Coming Out Later

When my Grandfather Learned I was ‘Queer’

First published at on January 14, 2011 A diversity speaker I know (who also happens to be a dear friend) is fond of saying, “People do the best they can with what they have.” When I first heard her say this, my immediate reaction was, “Well, that’s obviously false.” In fact, I still think… Continue reading When my Grandfather Learned I was ‘Queer’

Friendship, Gayness, and Death

First published at on November 12, 2010 When I first acknowledged to myself at 19 that I was gay, there were two friends that I needed to tell right away. I told Scott first. We were fellow candidates with the Capuchin Franciscans, aspiring to be priests. (We continued to affectionately call each other “Brother”… Continue reading Friendship, Gayness, and Death

Bullying, the Blame Game

First published at on October 8, 2010 About twenty-five years ago, my sister (who was then around ten years old) decided one day to practice cartwheels in our modestly-sized suburban living room. Had my parents been around, they would have stopped her. They would have mildly scolded her, and she would have felt mildly… Continue reading Bullying, the Blame Game

Ken Mehlman’s New Beginning?

First published at on August 27, 2010 In some circles, Ken Mehlman’s coming out as gay this week was about as shocking as Rosie O’Donnell’s coming out in 2002, or Ricky Martin’s coming out earlier this year. Others were quite surprised. Still others asked, “Who’s Ken Mehlman?” Answer: Ken Mehlman is, according to the… Continue reading Ken Mehlman’s New Beginning?

What I Learned at Gay Camp

First published at Between the Lines News on August 5, 2010 “Remind me, dear,” I said to my partner Mark on the way to the airport, “what I am absolutely, positively not doing again next year?” “You are not doing Camp next year,” he dutifully replied. We had repeated this dialogue many times in the… Continue reading What I Learned at Gay Camp